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Demi Lovato says her life was 'controlled' by her team before past relapse

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Demi Lovato breaks her silence and details her relapse in emotional interview
Jose Sena Goulao/EPA via Shutterstock
ByAndrea Tuccillo
March 05, 2020, 6:30 PM

Demi Lovato is revealing more details about her eating disorder and what caused her to relapse in 2018.

On "The Ellen DeGeneres Show" Thursday, the singer claimed her old management team used to control her food, even removing the phone from her hotel room so she couldn't call room service.

For many years she said she didn’t have a birthday cake, eating a slice of watermelon with fat-free whipped cream instead. "I think at some point it becomes dangerous to try to control someone’s food when they’re in recovery from an eating disorder," Lovato told DeGeneres.

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The singer said her eating disorder continued to get worse and she tried reaching out for help, but her team accused her of being "selfish" and played on her fear of abandonment.

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"I was stuck in this unhappy position and here I am sober and I’m thinking to myself, 'I'm six years sober but I’m miserable. I’m even more miserable than I was when I was drinking. Why am I sober?'" she said.

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Lovato added, "That night, I went to a party and there was other stuff there, and it was only three months before I ended up into the hospital with an OD."

She went on, "Ultimately, I made the decision that got me to where I am today. As long as you take the responsibility, you can move past it and learn to love yourself the way you deserve to be loved."

Lovato's new song, "I Love Me," spreads that very message. She shared a sneak peek of the song, which comes out Friday, and the video during her appearance on "Ellen."

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MORE: African-American eating disorder survivor shares her message that eating disorders don't just affect 'thin, young, white affluent women'

For more information on eating disorders, including warning signs and how to find support and help, visit the National Eating Disorders Association.

If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call the toll-free National Alliance on Mental Illness helpline at 800-950-NAMI.

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