‘I need help being mommy': Woman's candid comments nail why moms should start asking for help
Parents are applauding a new mother's confession about why women need to ask loved ones for help during the postpartum period.
“It’s so hard to ask for help. Because you’re supposed to be ‘mommy,’" the mother writes in the post, shared by Humans of New York (HONY). "And you never want to say: ‘I need help being mommy.’"
The woman, whose name was not revealed by HONY, explained that since she was the one who carried her child, she didn't want to look to others for support or ask them to "stop their lives" for her.
"But eventually I had to give in," she added. "I’m just one person and being ‘mama’ 24/7 can make you crazy."
Her story resonated with thousands of parents after HONY shared it on its Facebook page.
"Mothers were never meant to shoulder children on their own," one person wrote. "We HAVE to get back to where we used to be: family and community and loving others first."
Another mom chimed in writing: "We're brought up to believe that we should be 'super mom' all the time, and we're just not."
One expectant mother admitted the struggle, too.
"I hate asking for help," she wrote. "Partly because no one has to ask me for it."
The mom, who was photographed by HONY while breastfeeding her child, admitted she was bothered that people around her were going on with their lives.
"I’d let things fester. And it was unhealthy for my relationships," she wrote. "I’d get heated with my mother and boyfriend. Instead of beginning with ‘Can you help?’ I’d lose my temper, and jump straight to: ‘Why aren’t you helping?’”
Ellen Brodrick, a certified nurse midwife at Mayo Clinic, said that help from loved ones is important -- as new mothers are experiencing a lack of sleep, physical recovery from giving birth and strong emotions related to welcoming a new family member into the household.
But, still, reaching out isn't always easy, she noted.
"The amount of support women and new parents receive really varies," Brodrick told "Good Morning America." "Some are surrounded by an attentive family and community of friends whereas others are more isolated -- it can be difficult to ask for help from people you don’t know well or if there is the perception that your request might be a burden to someone else."
Brodrick said that prior to going home from the hospital, she encourages patients to think about who they can call on for help in the early weeks after having a baby. She also recommends making a list sooner than later of what you need emotionally and physically whether that be a casserole, or to just drop by and hold your newborn.
"[It's] especially helpful if someone calls unsolicited asking what need[s] to be done," Brodrick added, "or for those family members who might need a little prompting."
