The High-Paid Wives Club

July 30, 2009 — -- I recently received a press release announcing the publication of perky new women's magazine that proudly asked, "Does your husband resent your income?"

My first thought was an indignant, "That old saw again?"

According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, 26 percent of women made more money than their husbands in 2006. As men have taken the brunt of U.S. layoffs since 2007, that statistic has surely risen.

Still, the articles about men being depressed, insecure or resentful about making less money than their wives keep on coming, as do those proclaiming that couples are more likely to divorce when the wife out-earns the husband. (Just a thought, but the fact that the woman can actually afford to leave might be a contributing factor, too.)

Once I got over my own indignation, though, I began to ponder what impact income might have on my own relationship should I one day I shack up with my boyfriend, a fellow member of Generation X. So I asked how he'd feel about me supporting him someday, say, if he wanted to take some time off work to renovate our future home or go back to graduate school. Or if he lost his job.

"I would love to be taken care of," he said. "But then how could I look my grandma in the eye? I may be a post-sexual-revolution guy, but deep down I'd still worry about being judged."

In other words, for some, old gender roles die hard.

Because my guy and I don't share a roof, checking account or marriage license, I conducted my own informal poll of couples who do. Although there were a handful of throwbacks who couldn't fathom a wife out-earning her husband, most said it was a non-issue.

"It's a whole new world out there and dads that stay at home are not perceived as losers," said Paul, 42, from the San Francisco Bay Area, who left a travel-intensive career as a talent agent and film producer to care for his 6-month-old son while his wife Naomi, an employment attorney, works full time.