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When I was asked face-to-face like that, my friends would respond similarly. So why did I always get so squirmy around the topic? I was never ashamed. But, more so, I felt left behind.

I think a lot of virgins feel it’s their deep, dark secret because they fear people will think there’s something wrong with them — like they are social failures. Adult virgins may worry those who find out will think that they’re awkward around those they’re attracted to or wonder if there’s an underlying reason people don’t want to sleep with them.

I dreaded being asked how I ended up being a virgin in my mid-20s because the reasoning was hard to pinpoint.

The main explanation was that I was a hopeless romantic waiting for a committed relationship with someone I felt comfortable with and attracted to. (Pretty much the same scenario Colton says he imagines.)

I once partially joked with a guy I was dating that I was still a virgin because I was a Jonas Brothers fan. To be honest, the Jonas Brothers, who said they waiting for marriage to have sex at the time, made me feel a lot less like an outcast. I think that today \"The Bachelor\" is having a similar effect.

At 26 years old, Colton is the first Bachelor lead to be open about his virginity. He’s also the show’s first male participant to declare himself a virgin. (Season 17’s Sean Lowe was a born-again virgin who never addressed his status on the show in 2013.)

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A post shared by bachelorabc (@bachelorabc) on Jan 10, 2019 at 6:00pm PST

I was one of the more prominent outspoken female virgins in the show’s history.

You may be wondering how I went from dodging sex talk with my friends to discussing my lack of a sex life on primetime TV. Well, allow me to quote Cameron Diaz’s character in \"The Holiday\": “Sex makes everything more complicated. Even not having it, because the not having it...makes it complicated.”

At 26-years-old, I was starting to think my virginity was turning guys off. I started thinking that it made them believe I wasn't someone they could have fun with. Dating me was serious. Most men respected it, but said it put a lot of pressure on them. Regardless of whether they thought my virginity was attractive or not, it was affecting my dating life to a certain degree.

I also shamelessly knew that mentioning it in my application for \"The Bachelor\" would set me apart from the pack and boost my odds of making the final crop of women.

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A post shared by Ashley Iaconetti (@ashley_iaconetti) on Jun 7, 2018 at 3:45pm PDT

Speaking about my inexperience on camera and with my love interests on the show was never among the most comfortable moments. However, it enabled me to practice emotional intimacy and helped me feel secure with my life choices.

I went from dreading the thoughts of my dad seeing press articles about my V-card to being able to speak with anyone who asked about it.

My willingness to talk candidly about the matter allowed some people to feel more secure with their virginity. I say this because four years after “coming out” as a virgin on \"The Bachelor,\" I still get people in public telling me that my openness empowered their decisions. All the times that I felt awkward were well worth it!

Now it’s Colton's turn to talk about his virginity more than he ever imagined he would. He’s a handsome man and an ex-professional athlete, which makes his virginity even more of a novelty.

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The wait is almost over...for #TheBachelor premiere, that is. Thanks to @juddapatow for debuting our other poster!

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My fear is that \"The Bachelor\" season harps on Colton’s virginity so much it causes virgins and young people to think that it’s weird to abstain.

My hope is that those people who are waiting to have sex — for whatever reasons they have — will be able to see Colton and feel less alone.

While the first two episodes have included a lot of innuendo and focused more on Colton finding his “first” and less on him finding his wife, like previous seasons, I believe the season as a whole will be a positive conversation starter.

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