Ashley Tisdale shares why she broke up with 'toxic' mom group
Ashley Tisdale-French is sharing why she left her mom group.
The Disney Channel star known for "High School Musical," "Phineas and Ferb," and more penned an essay titled "Breaking Up With My Toxic Mom Group" for The Cut published Jan. 1, writing that she had encountered what she felt was "high school drama" in a mom group she joined after the birth of her first daughter, Jupiter, whom she shares with husband Christopher French.
At first, Tisdale-French said she was "impressed" by the women and felt "energized" by them, as many of them were busy working parents who were running their own companies while raising kids, as she was. She added that she "felt a sense of belonging" and felt that she had "found my village."
However, Tisdale-French said she began to feel "increasingly left out" from the group after she said she was not invited to multiple get-togethers. When she was invited to one particular gathering, she said, she was sat near the host, "at the end of the table, far from the rest of the women."
"At first, I tried not to take things personally," she wrote. "It's not like people aren't allowed to get together without me -- and maybe there were perfectly good reasons that I hadn't been invited. We were all busy, life was hectic. I told myself it was all in my head and it wasn't a big deal."
The "Suite Life of Zack & Cody" star went on, writing that the growing distance ultimately led her to text the group after being left out from yet another group hang, telling them, "This is too high school for me and I don't want to take part in it anymore."
"It didn't exactly go over well," she added.
Tisdale-French said some of the women tried to patch things up with her in the aftermath of that message.
"One sent flowers, then ignored me when I thanked her for them," she wrote. "Another tried to convince me that everyone assumed I'd been invited to gatherings and just hadn't shown up. 'Then why didn’t anyone ever ask where I was?' I wondered."
Ultimately, she said "the group dynamic stopped being healthy and positive -- for me, anyway."
While Tisdale-French didn't name any of the women in the mom group, she added, "I have never considered the moms to be bad people. (Maybe one.)"
Tisdale-French, who also shares another daughter, Emerson, with her husband, also reflected on motherhood, writing that she "couldn't stay quiet" about what she experienced with the mom group because of the example she wanted to set for her children.
"I kept thinking, Aren't we supposed to be teaching our kids to speak up for themselves when their feelings are hurt? When they get left out on the playground, aren't we supposed to teach kids to include each other?" she wrote. "I knew I had to speak up for myself, just like I would want my daughters to do."
She also shared a message for other moms: "Motherhood has enough challenges without having to wonder if the people around you are on your side."
"You deserve to go through motherhood with people who actually, you know, like you," she wrote. "And if you have to wonder if they do, here's the hard-earned lesson I hope you'll take to heart: It's not the right group for you. Even if it looks like they're having the best time on Instagram."
"Good Morning America" has reached out to Tisdale-French for comment.
The Walt Disney Co. is the parent company of ABC News.
