Parenting expert shares how 'micromoments' can help kids
Many parents are feeling stressed out and stretched thin, which can impact the amount of quality time they spend with their kids, but parenting expert Ericka Souter is sharing how so-called "micromoments" can help busy parents quickly connect with their children on an ongoing and everyday basis.
Souter joined "Good Morning America" Wednesday and offered several tips for parents of both young children and older kids.
What is a 'micromoment'?
Souter explained that a "micromoment" is an "intentional" moment with a child that can be as short as 10 to 30 seconds.
"These are brief, intentional moments where you can connect with your kids for 10 to 30 seconds," Souter explained.
"Many parents feel this pressure to bond with their kids in big, splashy moments or big trips, but research shows us that it's about frequency and consistency, and so, you can bond with your kids in these little, tiny moments during the regular part of your day," Souter continued.
Examples of 'micromoments'
There are multiple ways parents can quickly and effectively connect with their children during any given day, including through what Souter calls the "one up, one down" method.
During the morning, Souter suggested starting a quick conversation with kids, asking them questions such as:
- What are you looking forward to today?
- What are you most excited about?
- What are you least excited about the day?
"This … helps [kids] build their emotional vocabulary and it lets them know that mixed feelings are OK," Souter said, adding that such leading questions help children manage any anxiety they may be feeling.
Another way Souter said parents can create a micromoment with their kids is to ask them to predict their upcoming day with an easy gesture.
"It's either going to be a thumbs up, thumbs sideway or thumbs down," said Souter. "It gives them a way to express how they're feeling without a lot of pressure. And what we know is that when kids are able to label their emotions early on, they're better at emotional regulation."
Parents can also take 30 seconds at bedtime to ask kids about their day and listen to their answers.
Nonverbal micromoments
Souter says micromoments don't always have to be dependent on a conversation with kids.
One strategy for parents is to try the 10-second eye contact and encouragement method, which will likely work more successfully with younger kids instead of older teens.
"During breakfast, [a parent] can look at [their child] and say, 'You got this. You have a good day. You're going to do great in your game,'" she said.
Souter also recommended parents try an "emotional anchor."
"I also love this idea of putting notes in the backpack," said Souter. "If they're having a stressful day, they can refer to it or look at it throughout the day if they have ups and downs."
"Research shows us that affirmations from caregivers results in higher self-esteem and more emotional resiliency," Souter added.
