A Mississippi mom is reminding parents not to feel pressured to make summer a perfect and magical time for their children.
Whitney Caves, a mom of one and a licensed professional counselor, shared an Instagram post about what she has consistently seen when the weather turns warm and school lets out for the summer.
"By now, most of you will have seen all the posts and reels floating around reminding you that you only have 18 summers with your kids. I feel sure these are only well intended, and it's true that kids are generally at home with us for a specific portion of their lives. It's true that summer sometimes brings the opportunity for a little extra fun. But because my work has taught me to often see life through the eyes of people who are hurting, I also see the pressure that can come along with this sentiment," Caves wrote in her reflective caption.
The 38-year-old told "Good Morning America" she was inspired to share her post after thinking back on her own experience going through a tough time a few summers ago.
"When I saw that [kind of post] for the first time, I was in the middle of a pretty difficult season personally," Caves recounted. "We were not having any sort of magical summer over at my house."
"Then, I know from working with clients for years, real life does not stop in the summer," Caves continued. "Family problems, financial problems, illness, all the regular things, they don't stop in the summer. Many people will keep on going to work in the summer. And so while I understand that well-intended sentiment, a lot of pressure and some guilt can come along with that, and I do not think that we have to carry that. I think we can ease up on that a bit."
Caves, who is mom to a 7-year-old daughter named Lily, said parents should simply do what they can for their kids, when they can, and not try to compare themselves to what they see other families doing around them or sharing on social media.
"Kids don't need a big expense or a big performance from us. A $10 sprinkler and some popsicles and staying up late … goes a really long way," Caves suggested.
"But sometimes, we can't even swing that, and it's OK," she added. "It's OK to be in a hard season. And if … you are in a hard season, your good season will come one day. The hard does not last forever, even though it feels like it can."
At the end of the day, Caves said she wants other parents to remember that social media can be a fun and inspiring place, but it's also not the be-all and end-all.
"That little square [on Instagram], it can never begin to compare to the richness, the goodness, the messiness of your wonderful, real life," Caves said.
And if social media is negatively impacting you and your family, Caves added that it's OK to take a step back.
"Set the boundaries that work for you. If you need to take this summer, if this is a hard season for you and you need to take the summer off from social media completely, I don't think you'll miss it," Caves advised.
"You choose what you are going to do as far as social media in your home goes this summer, because if you do not choose, it will choose for you," she said.
